i'm going grocery shopping. i might see if i can get under my car and do something about that noisy exhaust leak.
there was a local video with about a dozen cops all coming down on this guy who weighed 130 pounds. it didn't bother me too much because it is pretty common. but the whole police thing is getting out of hand. last night, i started filling out my irresponsibility quiz, which takes forever. they ask quetions like "do you believe terrorism is a good thing?" or "do you smoke cigarettes?" where is this information going? what does it have to do with accidentally writing a bad check? they also ask you to list expenses from your checking account. here is my response to that page - "You have no legal right to this information. I have not been found guilty of a crime, I have not been charged with a crime, and I have not committed a crime. If legislation has sanctioned these questions, they are nonetheless illegal and will not stand up in higher courts."
basically, they address the test to assumed social retards. It is really condescending and disgusting. Then we have that lady who dyed her poodle with harmless beet juice, and is "breaking the law." And we have a woman who stepped away from her car for a few minutes and was arrested for child endangerment. Even though, after three months, this case was thrown out, the police chief is "standing by" the arresting officer. It never ends - the illegal beatings, the infringents on privacy, the rationalisations of "probable cause," the Bush administration's suspension of habeus corpus and the Justice Department's "legalisation" of illegal tortures, the FBI's wiretapping of innocent people even despite court orders to desist. The illegality of smoking, of "public drinking" during the Saint Pat's Parade in Chicago, and on and on. You can be detained and searched by the police for ANY reason. This is the same foolish climate of prohibition during the Depression which preceded World War II. It is all insanity.
fri 4:30 pm
I should be posting a little more, now that i have my car back, and it's spring. i am pretty happy right now. i strapped on my black leather backpack with my car battery inside and walked several blocks to the bus station. not comfortable. then i took a bus to Farm&Fleet. they gave me a new battery and i bought a battery charger. it was crazy to see the farther west side of rockford, about a third of the houses had tonnes of junk littering their lawns. there was even a Model T under a tarp. so i was relatively pissed in a meditative way about how the City has come down on OUR properties here for silly infractions, when all hell is loose on the far west side. when i came out of F&F, there was this tall black guy who started talking to me but he was scary. while i was waiting for the bu back downtown, he walked around at about .0 miles per hour. he was "enjoying the weather" but the fact was he was clinically insane and sadly without a life. still waiting, i see him walking down the middle of the highway, forever. people were honking at him. i bet he felt important. it kind of confirmed my new motivation to get my own life back. what the hell am i doing here?! then on the bus, some lady got on with her three bald sons. one little 3 or 4 year old bald son kept looking at me. i guess i impressed him becaue i m naturally cool. then he shouts out that he loves the bus. anyway, i started pondering things. here's this little bald kid looking around and experiencing the dumbest of stuff. and here am i sitting next to him. i will be dead one day and he will still be alive. and i, madman101, will belong to his long-forgotten past. like adults were once a part of my stupid child past, when life seemed so promising and exciting, and now many of them are just plain dead. i couldn't reach out to them then or now. and they influenced my life in various major ways, but it is all forgotten to me now. their special meanings, and moments, the most precious for a child, are all gone forever. it is creepy spooky. to think that I am - perhaps at the most - a phantom in some new generation's forgotten past. i am THE OLD WAY. i am THE WAY THINGS USED TO BE WHEN AMERICA WAS GREAT. I was like the guy who served sodas in the 50's. I was like the white haired laundry man who used to let me listen to SWING music in his laundry, and later died of a heart attack and completely disappeared from the meaning of my life. I have to admit, I have stopped wanting to do GREAT egotistical things with my life. But this is making me think twice. In the bigger picture, being human is so sweetly pathetic.
the far-west side of rockford is a bizarre twilight zone. there, urban blacks and proud libertarian white trash mix confusingly. one white lady got on the bus and started talking nigga talk. then a white couple got on and they talked like they were straight out of 1950's Wisconsin. It's very weird, and about as intriguing as the South. I don't care what you say about Northern urbanisation. The South is EVERYWHERE.
so - i put my new battery in, and took Kurka for a long-needed drive. my car is loud again because of cruel winter, and i will still be driving a lot les until i get that fixed. at the store parking lot, i turned off my car and my CD player kept playing! that was because of my new solar charger. i think that's so awesome. then i bought some beer at the store and started talking to the cashier there. she always asks me what beer she should buy. i like her and she likes me. but he has a boyfriend. even though she is a bad ass, and used to think i was dweeby, she gave me the always-suspect "thank YOU" after i left, saying thank you. so i start thinking she should drop her boyfriend, or else we should all go out and get drunk. but let me be a pig now - the problem is that she has a lower metbolism than I - i.e., she's chubby. i'm sorry if i sound mean, but i just can't get a woody for a chubby chick. and i don't know why the hell i get so many of them. thay should stop that. "but," you say, "maybe she might be that one special girl!" - i agree with this in theory - i could make love to an ozone hole if i thought she was THAT ONE SPECIAL GIRL. but the problem with me is that i am not looking or ever expecting tht one special girl. i have given up - at least on Rockford. plus i have no money, and i don't want to go through the whole gf thing again because it only makes me poorer.
i am always amazed that chubby girls seem to have an exponentially higher sex drive than skinny socially-preoccupied premadonnas. it never made sense to me. if you have a lower metabolism, you should have a lower sex drive. but if all i wanted out of a girl was her sex drive, i would have 12 children by now. my self-esteem is aristocratic. i will not go for a chubby girl. it's my mitochondrial right. we are half of the equation. get used to it. the last chubby girl i dated was a bulimic - oh wait - and so was ashley.
i always get hot skinny babes checking me out from afar. but they disappear with daylight. i did have a super skinny blonde gf once, but that was then. she had a classic roman nose, very attractive. but she couldn't sing for shit. at the time, that really disturbed me. if you have a high metabolism, you should be able to sing!
so - i am thinking i might go out on Saint Pat's - i could afford it. I just don't know where i should go around here. Any suggestions?
I have been so long avoiding people. And it has saved me a lot of money. That girl at the bank likes me, and she has a high metabolism, & she had SOME sense of humour but not enough. As far as that goes, almost nothing is enough after Ashley. God damn Oklahoma and it's pathetically proud naivite. Did you know it was IMMIGRANTS who wrote Oklahoma? And Porgy and Bess?
The whole thing about jazz and the immigrant influence has been a minor obsession of mine, and now there's a book out about it.
Now we end, as all things should, with the topic of global warming. This would have gone in the quiz but I want to talk about it a little - Did you know that over the past 50 years, the oceans have risen by four inches?! If it weren't for man-made dams, they would have risen by 5 INCHES. And scientists are at a loss to figure out why they have risen so much. Well - this is exactly the kind of problem that completely consumes me. I haven't computed excessively, and it is a very complex problem, but I do have some suggestions: Public urination. Diverting urine and other wastes into public sanitation plants means that the waste goes right into the rivers, instead of outhouses. And this also holds true for hog farms and such. Also, with rising temps, the land tends to evapourate more water than before. And that includes via crops. And also, shrinking ice caps on mountains. And finally, an increase of algae adds volume to the oceans. But the intriguing idea is this: What if water is somehow being CREATED, as somehow through the use of fossil fuels? Fascinating problem.
and another thing - scientists are now wringing their hands because they had no idea that China would be emitting so much carbon dioxide. "it's like a whole new Germany came out of nowhere!" China's carbon output has far exeeded ours (by amount and) by rate of increase. Because all global warming predictions are now 10 years old. But I COULD HAVE PREDICTED THAT TEN YEARS AGO! What the hell is science doing if it can't even take into account even common sense economic predictions?! Science is too cautious. It frustrates me. It is too confined to it's own labouratories. Most scientists don't know shit about economics or politics. It really really frustrates me that the great human race can't get it's silly shit together in a crises that portends not only plantary extinctions, but social upheaval, mass migrations and mass starvation, AND world wars! God it is so so stupid.
Geraldine Ferraro could only say that cuz she is a woman a har har har.
tiger woods bothers me. he is perfecting the art of golf beyond all human expectations, and this bothers me because i don't give a shit about golf. i do a lot of perfect things no one gives a shit about, why can't i be in the news? and this guy wouldn't be so popular if he wasn't black. before you drop me, i am making a snide reference to geraldine ferrarto's racist remark, i am in fact being politically correct and in no way racist although i do believe eskimos are the master race, what with global warming and all. now you say to youself, "What? Why am i even reading this crap?"
because you want me. it is all because i am tantalisingly cool. this is all because i use the letter S instead of Z and you can't resist it. last night i dreamt i was a giant butterfly. not really. i dreamt i was reading a book with my sister. it was about Emerson or Thoreau but they were more like Tom Sawyer, and some Mark Twain guy kept popping in. It was cool because when i read, i would SEE the mississippi and other such natural stuff like that there. A girl's breast popped out of the page and began nuzzling me. Not really. The night before this, I dreamt I was in the White House. I kept trying to find the way to the private basement so I could then slip outside and get to the garden, where my beautiful eggplants were maturing. But in reality, my radio was on, and tuned to an interview with Arlen Specter, so Arlen Specter was everywhere talking about all this important stuff. Which I actually found very cool and patriotic. Poor Arlen Specter is going to run for president when he is 80 years old yo. I'm serious.
I spent a lot of yesterday looking for my Farm&Fleet receipt for my car battery. It was a pain. Then I gave up, but incidentally looked into a big Oatmeal container, and it was in there. So all I have to do is take my battery there and get it replaced or recharged. And yet, I don't really need my car that much, even though it is, like me, full of gas. I am in a money-saving rut. I can't believe I am doing so well even after I spent half my income on that stupid bounced check. I've also been cleaning. And trying to cook potato scones but failing because my sister took the cookbook. Sexist asshole. I ordered a solar battery charger for $30 total, but it still hasn't arrived. My garage is flooded and bleeding my battery so I have to fix that too. I have to build a drainage thing through the driveway. I am pretty glad it's Spring and am looking forward to doing a bit of work outside. I want to build a tall gun turret in my back yard to shoot drunks and cats.
I am enjoying brown rice these days. See - i'm not racist at all. But those damn husks go right through me. Death to husks. How the hell did corn get so big? Really? You'd think corn would have been developed in ancient Egypt or something. But all the old world has is tiny rice and wheat grains. How the FUCK did corn get so big in backwater America?! Plus you had to have two stomachs to digest the damn stuff. Heineken's has about 20% more alcohol than Michelob's, according to my studies.
I threw a big old loaf of raison Chala out for the animals. This is actually the most important time of the year to feed the animalia, because they are awake but exhausted and there is scant other food around. Well, I was completely amazed how that thing completely DISAPPEARED over the course of the day! PS - this is not true for pets - they need to eat less now.
Well - hurray for Kristen! Good for her! Fucking hore. God bless her.
btw - some new EXHAUSTIVE study has shown Iraq was big on terrorism, but there was NEVER ANY AL QAIDA LINK. NEVER. EVER. I remember the Congressional vote on supporting Bush's invasion of Iraq. I thought the whole world had gone mad. Because I COULD PLAINLY SEE IT WAS ALL BULLSHIT. Really. I was outraged and all alone in these feelings. It all seemed surreal and completely Neanderthal. (Even though I love the TRUE Neanderthals of old). And I couldn't believe Hillary was joining in on the vote. So - honestly - that's one reason I don't support Hillary. She was after popularity for ulterior reasons. Delete her warnings of possible abuse - she trusted Bush and she was stupid to do so. I think back then I had a newspaper column and was also writing tonnes of letters-to-the-editor, but I have given up on that activism for the rest of my life i think. Back to Hillary - another flub... She was being interviewed about Florida/Michigan. She was bragging about how she got 55% of the vote in Michigan, and the interviewer said, "Even though Barack Obama's name wasn't on the list?" And she shot back sweetly, "Well, that was his CHOICE, Steve!" Um - wait - don't hand me that crap. She put her name on the bill because she was cheating. Barack Obama chose NOT to cheat - to play by the rules - and I'm sorry, but that's a GOOD thing. And it isn't like he doesn't KNOW how to cheat, he does, and he rose above it. Good God I hope he wins.
mon 12;30 am
wow. awesome pizza. i really wanted pizza tonight but most of the busineses like Anna's were either closed or closed. I think Anna's might be out of business. Bye Emily! So I finally called some shop that was open til 1:30am - SAM's. Here's what I know about SAM's - my Italian aunt told me the best Chicago Italian bread around here is from SAM's. And I once found a checkbook from some lady who looked like her life was ending, but she kept ordering pizza from SAM's, (I let the police know about this - i was concerned).... But i ended up ordering from SAM's for $15, and it was the best I've ever had - that beats Anna's and Cimino's. Although a lot was because I made my own extra topping. It didn't have as much yummy cheese topping, but it wasn't as greesy either, and it's tomato sauce rocked and obviously involved olive oil. The crust was perfect. But prolly had trans-fats argh. Listen - around here, we know our pizza - and I'm telling you, this is good. Waiting for it, I sat on my front porch with Kurska, watching Conan, and at the half-hour point, I stepped out to warm up the yellow onions i was going to add as a topping. Kurska started yapping, so the pizza guy was already here, in some tool truck. I already started yapping at the guy and invited him in - he said he hd no need to see my credit card. He told me he thought I was Italian. I get that a lot, mostly Italian, but a lot of people think I am the same race as them, even Asians and Blacks, even if it confounds reason. So this guy offers me $50 for the upright piano on my front porch. I told him two relatives on opposite coasts want it. But hell if they'll ever get it. He told me he used to work at the famous Jackson Piano. I told him the piano was prolly worth a hell of a lot more and he knew it, but somehow we were both cool with that. So now I'm planning on selling it to him for $100 as long as I can get a sign-off from the relatives, which won't be hard. But the main point is - they have awesome pizza, and they still do business like fucking Italians! I want more! I want to be an Irish Mafioso! I called him SIR even despite my flippant Irish ways, and he will never forget it. That's worth another $50. God, being male is so cool sometimes.
Except the whole dying of liver disease and everything. "He the Michelob Man - He always have the money!" "We get you more a tiki tiki yak yak!" "Huh? What?" I want to introduce my dangerous Iraqi liquor store friends to the Pakistani guys at the gas station so they can go into business together. But never - NEVER. Everybody want to shoot shoot die die. All these Shiks and Suni's and Hindu's and Bosnians and Turks, etc. - they all killin countries. What happens when they move to USA into same neighbourhood? They fucking freak. Because we got the good blacks bein king of poverty yo.
So, I admit some whote male advantage, I have more opportunity to be friendly. But if you FREAKIN GODDAM LIBERAL FREAKY SORTS want to take that away from me then you aren't my friends nah nah NAH! cuz i be poor as a fuckin nigga and friendly is all i be wanting yo.
um - was this SUNDAY? -
i think that girl on the bus gave me the flu. sometmes, i will catch the flu and manage not to get too sick, but because of cfs, it sticks around a longer time. so i have been resting and trying not to get really sick.
do you know what is awesome? i saw a fox trotting down the sidewalk in my neighbourhood the other night - and i live in the middle of a fairly large city.
one of my fav comfort foods is cheese toasties, so i made some. here's my tips on how to make FAST cheese toasties: lightly toast your bread. then lightly melt your cheese on the open pieces in a toaster over or in the microwave, (other ingredients can include macaroni and cheese, a little tomato, a tiny bit of onion, salt, pepper, or some grren spices like). meanwhile, you have been preparing a little pan of shallow hot oil. close the sandwiches and toss one into the hot oil. immediately flip it over. beware of splatter. if the oil is very hot, they will toast very quickly, but you might also burn the house down. and, mind you, these are pretty darned oily.
i use a combo of olive, canola, and sunflower oils. i have never cooked with walnut, so i don't know how it fares, but it is one of the healthiest and is sold at some health stores. even though ower has some major splatter problems, i have found it the most tasty in which to fry eggs, as well as other foods.
now the quiz... TRUE OR FALSE?: (feel free to improve and repost!)
THE SCIENCE QUIZ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.......
1 - 15% of the meat in Europe contains MRSA virus
2 - Wrens are the most common bird in the world.
3 - The most luxurious train in the world travels between the capitals of Tibet and China
4 - some people in Haiti are so poor they eat cookies made of dirt, salt and veggie oil
5 - Isreali scientists have found a greater risk for breast cancer for women who are exposed to light at night - this was accomplished via google-type mapping
6 - large spiders and worms exist in Antarctica.
7 - some people believe Lizard Man is a member of intelligent aliens who live underground and fly sophisticated spacecraft
5 - these same aliens live under Antarctica and are gathering ways to destroy us, to stop the global warming of their icy shield
it is thought that the U.S. is building concentration camps in preparation for global warming
if you slice an earthworm in half both halves will live and regenerate into new earthworms
6 - people who work in hog farms often have MRSA virus growing in their nasal passages
7 - for my area, this last February was the coldest and snowiest on record
8 - it is thought that microbes also found on Mars may one day help in garbage disposal.
9 - the ivory billed woodpecker is extinct
10 - the largest whale in the world eats microscopic plankton
11 - the smallest egg relative to bird body size is that of the Ostrich.
12 - Cocaine which only existed in South America has been found in Egyptian mummies.
13 - in one country in Southeast Asia, you will be fined thousands of dong for owning a hampster.
14 - some scientists believe insecticides, such as the spraying for West Nile virus, and global warming, are killing our bats and bees
15 - the recent massive meat recall was greatly prompted by a fear of mad cow disease
16 - HDTVs use six times less energy than regular TVs.
17 - the largest fish in the world is the whale shark
18 - hog farming is responsible for flu viruses, MRSA virus, lysteria, fatal tape worms, e coli, salmonella, and many other possible mutations and immune-resistant superbugs
19 - some strange unknown force is acting on our spacecraft, which some people believe is dark matter and some believe is the reverse-dipole electromagnetic effect
20 - it is thought that virtual Japanese immunity to AIDS may be due to some properties of sushi
21 - there is more genetic diversity among Africans than among people's eminating from all other continents.
22 - dogs have no sense of rythym
23 - a cup of hot water will freeze quicker than a cup of cold water when put in the freezer.
24 - natural gas, as that used by your gas oven, has no smell
25 - strange lights, stone discs and giant worms have been reported in Space.
26 - beets are a great investment.
27 - superconductor-collider experiments in France have lent to support to the existence of God, although he would necessarilly be an Atheist
28 - NASA has recently said that our solar system is prolly made up of thousands of planet-sized planets
29 - many people are now confusing the smell of natural gas with the smell of breakfast meals at Starbucks
30 - one of the leading causes of death is mistakes by doctors
31 - the Cherokee were found to have genes common in Jews.
32 - men with large bicepts have been shown to have a smaller risk of having miscarriages
33 - hyenas have been found to be more related to humans than to canine or feline species
34 - the Congressional race to replace the longest-running Speaker of the House was won by a Democratic Physicist
35 - electromagnetic batteries and steam engines existed in the times of ancient Egypt
36 - the second most likely place for people to die is on the toilet
37 - mushrooms are rich in a nutrient that may thwart Autism
38 - the yoyo was inititially created as a weapon of war
39 - prisoners in former USSR prison camps have been shown to have a significant correlation with typhoid resistance
40 - humans have increased the size of their brain by one cubic centimeter in the last 500 years
41 - one planet thought to harbour UFO aliens, Venus, constantly shows only one side to the earth, like our orbitting moon, despite the various orbital relationships of the two planets
42 - dogs have better eyesight than cats
43 - penguins have been found to offer a promising new source of possible improvements on anti-freeze
44 - genes of Japanese Ainu are common in some Native American tribes of the Northwest.
45 - domestic dogs in Ethiopia have been taught successfully to work all phases of coffee production
46 - cats which have had there cerebellums successfully removed show promising signs of language development over time
47 - if you slice one spike of a starfish off, the starfish will grow a new spike, and the spike will grow a new starfish
48 - there is now a glut of chimpanzees in this country caused by the search for a cure for AIDS
49 - the modern human brain is larger than the extinct Neanderthal brain
50 - George Bush has ironically had one of the most science-favourable administrations in history
51 - the only species to be found to be able to laugh are humans
52 - global warming does exist, and a significant cause may be an increased intensity of solar radiation
53 - there are only four basic words for SNOW in the Eskimo language
54 - the longest a chicken has lived with it's head cut off has been two years
55 - the size of cat brains has been shrinking dramatically over the centuries
56 - the actual cost of the war in Iraq is over three trillion dollars
57 - it has been found that stud horses produce more sperm when their mates are dressed in horse lingerie
58 - the largest forest disaster was caused by recent western wildfires
59 - a sizeable contribution to global warming has been found to be farts
60 - many scientists believe the earth's magnetic poles are preparing to shift drastically, and some people believe this will occur around 2012
61 - fungi are more similar to animals than to plants
62 - it has been found that dogs sent into space suffer from delusions of grandeur while monkeys sent into space generally knit for the rest of their lives
63 - the tiger shark does not lay eggs, it gives birth to live baby sharks
64 - some members of the guppy family grow to several feet long
65 - the smallest primate of north america weighed one ounce
66 - i once ate a live guppy
67 - since dogs have no sweat glands, they must cool themselves by using their blow-hole
68 - turds are a major source of energy in impoverished countries
69 - Italian bread uses a certain yeast which makes you more likely to be audited by the IRS
70 - The first life-jackets were made of wood.
71 - NASA has been keeping secret the fact that the first Chimp in space came back as Martha Stewart
72 - Christopher Columbus: A - Discovered America, B - Tried to prove the World is round, C - Wore panties, C - Died thinking he reached some place in India, D - All of the above
73 - The state of Maryland was named after: A - Mary Queen of Scotts, B - Marty Queen of Fags, C - A gaggle of happy hippies, D - The Virgin Mary's spotless kitchen
74 - The continent of America was named after: A - A merry-go-round, B - Mount Vesuvius, C - Shakira, D - A power-juicer, E - A stupid map-maker, F - Ugly Betty
75 - The first president of our country was made a general by: A - a supporter of the British, B - The third president, C - Dorkus Finbee, D - A man who died on the Fourth of July, E - Bob Hope
76 - Canada was named after, A - Heugonauts were were proud of their ability to add, B - A can of Coke, C - Canada was never officially named, D - I have no idea, E - Dorkus Finbee
77 - King Charles the Third's penis stretched half-way to America when flacid
78 - The original American Colonies were part of Pangea prior to plate techtonics, which subsequently lead to the creation of the fly-ball
I watched little bits of MOST OUTRAGEOUS MOMENTS. One bit was most interesting to me. Some horse farted in the backround while some news guy was doing a report - the guy cracked up. What I was more interested in was the horse. I could see it's mind at work. It started keying in on the guy laughing. Then it shook it's head about, saying, "Yeah, that's funny, but I'm cool - I farted." Animals are MORE FUN to read than humans, when you realise that they relatively have the same intelligence, but they don't have our language signs, etc. I mainly find humans boring and repetative. I mainly find humans boring and repetative.
Clinton is once again overshooting her wad. Suggesting she would consider Obama as VP. Every time she scores a big win, she talks like she is the frontrunner. What we are looking for is the opposite of this hubris. Obama is great because, even though he disdains negative campaigning, he always comes back on any demeaning charges. Even though I support Florida and Michigan mail-ins, and even if Clinton somehow comes out ahead, I will be severely disappointed if the Superdelegates nominate Clinton. Obama is the one to win, and if Clinton gets a job as Attourney General, then she can run later. But Obama doesn't WANT to run again, as a commitment to his wife. So I am totally going for Obama. You don't think international back-stabbing experience comes from working on the streets of Chicago? It does. He's not naive. He's not inexperienced. If anything, Clinton is. God, I love being biased. I am such a racist misogynistioso.
Yes - I admit it. Damn all blacks, damn all Hispanics, damn those crazy Eastern Europeans with their yat-a-tat tongues, and damn Italians and Jews and those, and damn these cigarettes, and damn those infadel Arabians and the crafty opportunistic yaketty yak Chinese and damn South America with their sumptious belly buttons and damn all the white devil men from Colonial England and the freakin Nazi bumblebutts and damn Russians with their whore bitches and damn Japan and Afghanistan and Iran and Pakistan and the IRS and corporations and unions and starving people and Yeti and Martians and everyone else! I AM THE MAN! Undamn only ME! Bow down to my over-reaching prostate. And so now let me say this sincerely from the heart - I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU ALL! THANK YOU FOR THIS AWARD! Let all of us live in peace and harmony and let my grave be remembered! Why?
It will all be over soon and what is the best you have given?
I live that you may turn philosophy into common sense.
I am already a dead man.
I fully expect no less than the obscurity of sand.
Wisdom is the retention of innocence through adversity. What more can I say?