Just pasting some possibly relevant comments:
Speaking of magic...
It's a GOOD thing to vent your feeling to people whom you haven't even met about other people in your life. Where else can you find virtually impartial opinions? Sometimes online friends can be better than "real" friends, because there is no danger when they open up and express their support or compassion. That can be so hard to do OFF line! Yet, online people need to be careful they're not lving in a dream world.
So - I kept a REAL journal, wherein I mega bitched aout people - then it turned into a search for meaning - then into a philosophical masterpiece, (unfortunately, that journal was accidentally destroyed!). Well, it was very refreshing to do this. Very much the right thing to do. People would wonder why I seemed so well-adjusted, so forgiving. It was all because of that safety valve! They all wondered, "What is his special magic?"
Everyody has a different vent/motivator in their lives. Many direct that into achievement in the day-to-day world... Into making money, gaining success, power, etc. I had to be careful that I didn't let my journal take me too far away from building a life for myself.
Here at LJ, I am hearing lots of females saying "all guys are jerks". I dealt with that one in real life. It doesn't bother me a bit.
I used to get depressed a lot. It is serious business. Sometimes talking just doesn't quite work. And one drifts away from human connections. I found that routine is the best thing - well - to pull me out of it. I once had a college roommie, and she was depressed, and anxious about school, her boyfriend, etc. She wanted to talk about everything. I just said, "I'm not trying to pretend I'm your mother or anything, but... Go clean up your room. Believe me, it will help". She did. And it did. And she was very appreciative, she gave me her boyfriend's jacket.
Well, I don't ever get depressed now. That's mainly due to having gotten so incredibly ill - I can't imagine what the point would be for me to get depressed. Life is so short. Sometimes, the only thing that works is hitting the wall. Please don't hit the wall. Listen to me. Life can be great. Fuck everyone if the only thing that facinates you is the spider in the corner. It's a fucking start!!!!!
If you communicate with me - know that sometimes I might come off as being insensitive. Sometimes I am, because I am so eager to have a fun life. Most times I am trying to humor people - so they can have a fun life. And, also, I sometimes employ reverse-psychology. SO, that's all. Bye.