where hypotheses come to die (madman101) wrote,
where hypotheses come to die
madman101

talk until you're blue

Basically still dealing w/ same CFS issue/s, esp. frontal brain.  I did email LL, etc.  So, that's out of the way.  My dog is too excitable lately: 1- Spring coming. 2- Bitch urine.  3- reaction to being yelled at by old man downstairs.  Today, my dog walked straight at a pedestrian just to look, so I gave him a big yank back, and the pedestrian just stood there as we walked away.  See how violence/anger propagates into neighbourhood and makes life worse?

I recently lost many browser tabs, so I have been going through history and digging up CL pages, looking at vehicles, etc.  I also tried to reinstall my firewall so i could access the IP list and do other input, but the only success was that I can again at least SEE what IP numbers are being blocked.  Prior to this, I couldn't see that, and so maybe the firewall was never ON(!)  Also tried to install my dial-up ISP's "accelerator", both online and via CD - no luck.  Maybe next time at library computers.  Yesterday, I spent a lot of time on phone talking to my ISP, only to end up ordering the security suite for another $8/mo from a sexy Indian.  But I plan on cancelling this.  Maybe the whole thing, and get local WiFi.  More expensive, but.

I may be trekking to supermarket tomorrow or Monday.  Already delayed by 2 days.  Other than that, I might stop going to library, laundromat, etc., for a while, to avoid Corona Monster.

Sometimes it seems that I am the subject of a grim absurdist story. You follow the main character through his days, and news of this distant virus keeps coming up, on the radio, etc., and you just know the conclusion will be that it kills him. Like that's how the universe was constructed for me. Although, thousands of other people share this same story. Which makes it even more ironic. Camus. Kafka. Dostoevsky... Defoe.. They haunt me like angels.  In Limbo.

I am listening to my Belly/Muses/Breeders/Pixies play list.  Need a car because this music deserves to DRIVE.  The second day I trudged to Walgreens, I had the following song going on in my head to help me through my struggle.  *shrugs*

Throwing Muses

Cult hero: Kristin Hersh...

The return of Belly

Tags: existentialism, hersh - kristen, limbo, music - belly, music - throwing muses
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